My ADD

My ADHD
Since I was a child I've always been a magical thinker.  When life was difficult or I would become sad, I would find myself retreating to my magical world I've created in my mind.  I did ok in school, in grammar school I did ok. I barely did work but for some reason when it came time to test I did really well often testing on the Iowa testing above my grade.  In 8th grade I believe I may have been in a special education class. I had a teacher that didn't teach and told us, "I'm still getting paid if y'all learn or not".  So at this point I started to think differently about the people I'd entrusted and believed in because they we're in a position of authority.

But fast forward......

I have discovered that I have difficulty focusing but I developed a better way of dealing with it because I am more aware of it.  I create a mental checklist of the things of things I need to do, as well as the timeframe in which to get those things accomplished.  I've also become aware of when my symptoms are worse. When they are worse I often find myself off task, off balance or simply off center.

Awareness

When I am surrounded by negative people or when I taken in too much of other people's stuff, negative energy, problems etc. my mind feels FULL, my mood DRAB.  I begin to understand that there is such a thing as being too empathetic. I begin to feel that I don't not HAVE to solve the issues of others. The problem, it bothers me to see others hurt. It's during these times that I have to do things to refocus and let go.

Those things are: being aware of what's bothering me, pray, meditate, mind travel i.e., try to pinpoint when I noticed the shift. Close my eyes and walk through that day writing out the parts that bothered me. Pray for the people, places and things involved in those situations and then go through the list and determine what I need to change (and then change it), if not let it go.